Daily Annoyances

"Stop staring at my ass..."


Since Jimmy seems to have sports on the lockdown today I think I am going to begin an installment I like to call "Daily Annoyances". Today I ran into two of them that always (to steal a line from the esteemed Peter Griffin) "grind my gears". Had the day off today so I hit up the gym, which has its own blog-ful of annoying material, but Ill skip it. Anyway after absolutely destroying my tri's and chest lifting like 6 plates at a time (thats a lie) I felt it was time for some cardio. I headed over and faced every man's dilemma, standard treadmill vs. intriguing elliptical. Well considering I felt my ass needed some major tonage, I hopped on the elip and prayed no other guy walked in the room. As I could feel my glutes starting to get tender I noticed that there is a "distance traveled" section on the elliptical dashboard, if you will. This really is interesting to me. If I'm jogging on the mill or pedaling on a bike I can, in my mind, understand how far a half mile or full mile is. But I have NEVER, and I doubt anyone else has, rode an elliptical down the street (though it would be a hilarious mental image) So although its saying to me "Hey Dude, you've gone 1 mile, congrats!" it means absolutely nothing to me. Maybe like "Hey you've been on this gay machine for 6 minutes and no other man has noticed you, congrats!" would be more appropriate.

The second thing that I want to harp on today is elevator etiquette in regards to entering. Doesn't it always seem like when you stop on a floor, and someone is waiting for the elevator, they absolutely bullrush the door thinking that no one is in there. Everytime I feel like I have to do a Dwight Freeney swim move to get out of the way. And then the person is all like "woah... excuse me... " I mean do they assume that these things only work in one capacity? I challenge you to be getting off an elevator where someone is waiting and they politely wait for you to get off. Never happens.

--MM--